How often do people confuse "discerning" with "judgmental"?

[Fimbrethil]

The main reason I ignored my gut instinct while dating a psychopath is that I strive for non-judgment. I was so focused on trying NOT to judge him as "wrong"/"bad" that I ignored the fact that his lying, cheating, manipulating, and emotional/psychological abuse was dangerous/toxic/unhealthy.

On my course of recovery I've lost maybe a dozen friends who continue to believe, like I did, that deciding a person's unhealthy behavior (like cheating or name-calling) is "wrong," "unhealthy," or even "wrong for me" is actually "judgmental".

Is this a common misconception? Or was it a case of "birds of a feather flock together" (because we became friends when I agreed with them)? Or does it come from living in a more progressive area?

[Blahina123]

This is a good point. I wanted to avoid looking judgmental when I noticed a few irregularities with my boyfriend's behavior during the early part of the relationship. I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

I don't know the exact origin of this former belief of mine. It could be what you state.